Yesterday was awful. The teacher’s assistant at daycare told me Zoe climbed the fence twice. Then the director came up to me and said the same thing. The thing you need to know about the daycare director is that even when things go WELL, she looks like she just ate something that made her sick that she believes could be poisonous. Seriously. I don’t know if she has anxiety disorder or an ulcer or what, but she gives off SO DAMN MUCH negative energy I can’t even stand to be around her. You know people like this? I’m married to an anxious person, but it’s nothing like what this woman is like. So I came home and told Chris. He said,
“Ok, so in a playground full of kids, our kid climbed the fence.”
“You’re telling me, that she climbed the fence.”
“Yes, she could have fallen.”
“From climbing the fence?”
Pause. “So what?”
“What do you mean?”
“Don’t kids climb fences???”
Boom. It hit me. Duh. Yea, what’s the big deal if she climbs a fence? No, it’s not safe, but there are kids climbing everywhere. Why the EXTRA concern with Zoe?? She almost fell – isn’t it their job to watch and make sure none of the kids get hurt?
Have I just run into my first case of prejudice against my kid?? Look, I’m not saying Zoe is easy, but she’s NOT stupid. She can’t communicate well, but believe me she understands “no”. One of my huge difficulties is trying to figure out discipline she will understand at her level. This was ALSO extremely hard on me when Amelia was a tot, I have no idea how to properly discipline if taking away toys, getting sent to bed, or time outs are not at my disposal. (Let’s not discuss hitting/spanking, ok?)
The daycare knows she understands, but I still get, “when are we getting the TSS???” with all the anxiety the director can possibly muster. (Is this a manipulation technique?) These things take time – it took like 4 months just to get a formal eval just to get MA just to find a TSS just to be told I need another EVAL!! Augh!!!
OK. There is nothing God gives me I can’t handle. Add to this, that this morning and yesterday morning were PURE hell with Amelia returning to daycare. Just thinking about it gives me the willies. I’m exhausted all the time, I’m unfocused on my writing and I’m falling apart a little bit. I need a vacation FROM my kids.
AND they need to get in bed earlier, by 8pm the latest. They are way too…UGH in the morning. It’s killing me. They need tighter boundaries too. And of course, they also need prep for school. It’s just too much on me. I am doing my best, but I’m thinking that maybe I need to find another daycare provider, just because I can’t even stand to see the director. Do NOT ask what she pulled on me the day before vacation. Or is it just the same everywhere??