This morning I read an article in “The Nation” called “The Upside of Ugly” by Jessica Valenti. In it, Valenti tells the story of 14-year-old Nadia Ilse, who received $40,000 worth of cosmetic surgery. The company that sponsored her surgery is a charity, Little Baby Face Foundation, performs surgeries on kids with facial deformities. When I think of facial deformities, I think of cleft palates, or young women who’ve had acid thrown on their face. The 14-year old in question had…ears that stuck out. Her problem? Getting bullied for not being pretty.
I’m not sure what the hell Little Baby Face was thinking (other then, “let’s promote ourselves!”), but when in God’s name did not fitting the unrealistic Photoshopped model standard become a deformity? What the hell are we saying to people with real disfigurement caused by disease, accidents or assault? Or for that matter, people who’s disabilities are visible, kids like Amelia, who have Down syndrome?
Valenti’s article is a must-read, because she hits on a topic that struck me: all the push for self-confidence and self-esteem in girls is a load of crap because the reality is that girls nowadays KNOW where they don’t measure up and can see tangible evidence of it. We’ve all had the pretty friend who got free drinks or evaded a speeding ticket because she batted her eyelashes. One look at not only anchorwomen and female journalists, but ALSO successful bloggers, and it’s clear that beauty is a job requirement. I just got back from BlogHer, and while I did have a fabulous time, I also felt somehow “less”, because fashion and a good sense of style are not my forte, and everyone else seemed to pull it off.
In fact, I completely got snubbed by a blogger at an event. She was dressed to the nines, and in heels, about 10 inches taller than me (I’m only 5 foot nothing, something I used to be proud of and now an incredible “fail” in our society). Because of her stature, she was able to look directly over my head as if I was not there, despite me smiling at her and trying to make “contact”. Other bloggers followed her lead and were barely nice to me, or didn’t introduce themselves.
Seriously, people, WTF grade are we in? I have no time for this BS. This was my only negative experience in a 5000-guest event…even a plain Jane like me can meet great people and I hopefully sowed the seeds for some great relationships, because of my passion for my cause, my blog, and you guys, my readers.
One wonders who if young lady will bully or snub others, now that she is “so pretty.”
HAVE YOU BEEN SNUBBED AS AN ADULT BECAUSE OF YOUR LOOKS OR STYLE?
PLEASE SHARE YOUR STORY!